OCTOBER 19, 2006
Word Count:250
“The Kangaroo Court of the Federal Conservative Party is now in session. Garth Turner, being tried in absentia, will have his fate determined. Before we proceed, are there any questions?”
“Yes, I have one. Shouldn’t Garth be allowed to participate? I mean, I can reach him right away. He could be here in a few minutes. It’s not like he’s hiding or anything.”
“You new here? That’s not the way we do things. Comments like that are best kept to yourself, unless of course you would like to find yourself as the accused in our next session.”
“Uh, er no. No more questions.”
“That’s better. Stockwell, you better have your people keep an eye on this guy too. Now let us proceed with the matter before us. I’ll lead this trial off by declaring him guilty. He has simply gone too far with this blog thing of his. Although I haven’t personally read any of his un-party-like ravings, such expression of free thought cannot be tolerated."
“So what are we going to do with him?”
“It’s time to pass sentence. He is officially expelled from the party. Stockwell, have the tech guys remove his computer.”
“It’s already done sir.”
“Good. Get his seat in the House of Commons moved away from us.”
“Already done.”
“And have the Queen’s Printer make up a new seating chart.”
“Already done.”
“The only remaining problem with this blog of his is that we can’t have a good old fashioned book burning… We’re adjourned.”
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