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Story Archive
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Eavesdroppings
Monday, 14 May 2007
COUNCILLOR SAYS STREETS BELONG TO HOPSCOTCH AND HOCKEY PLAYERS TOO
Topic: May 14, 2007
"Dwayne Johnson here."
"You a manager Dwayne?"
"Yes."
"Good."
"Always a pleasure to speak to a fan. What can I do for you Mr...?"
"John Carruthers. 47 Maple Street. I'm a taxpayer and I want action!"
"Oh! Old Man Carruthers! Why didn't you say so in the first place? What can the city do for you today?"
"They've gone too far! Even worse than when they were playing hockey in the streets."
"Calm down now sir. What is it? What could be worse than (shudder) street hockey?"
"You're not gonna believe it I tells ya."
"I'm a manager, I'll believe most anything I'm told."
"Well Dwayne, I hate to bring bad news to good people like yourself, I'm a retired manager myself, but those meddlesome kids have done gone and marked up a perfectly good city sidewalk."
"You're kidding."
"Wish I was Dwayne. Squares and numbers as far as the eye can see. Lines are all crooked too. I'm sure the chalk dust can't be good for my lawn neither."
"You don't mean..."
"Yep. Hopscotch."
"Those bastards! When will it ever end?"
"Never Dwayne, never. That's why you got squash this down now. Before it grows. Crush ‘em while they're young."
"I'm on it. I'll have a team down there right away. I've got a fleet of sidewalk scrubbing machines I've been itching to try out. We'll have your neighbourhood neat, organised and efficient, just the way it should be."
"Thanks Dwayne I'll sleep better knowing you're on the job."

Posted by JimSadlemyer at 10:16 AM PDT
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